Thursday, 14 May 2015

Service Submission

I thought I'd tackle another topic where I've seen a lot of misunderstanding. What I hear is that many people don't understand why someone would want to give service, or how this is related to sex. And I can understand that; how can it be sexy or arousing to wash someone's dishes or to make dinner? That's where D/s is such a beautiful thing. Acts aren't inherently Dominant or submissive; it's the mindset of the people performing those actions. Service can be a very intimate way to show your partner that you value their happiness and want to make their life easier. And if you get off on pleasing your partner, seeing that smile bloom across their face can give you the emotional satisfaction that you want. After all, who among us hasn't gone to some trouble for a partner, say cooking a special meal or planning down to the details an amazing date, purely for knowing what a wonderful experience you could create for someone you love? Now of course, that doesn't make you submissive. But if you are doing it with a submissive mindset and your Dominant accepts it as such, it can be part of a really intimate connection. For me, it's the mindfulness; it's that we are choosing to do these actions as part of the foundation of the relationship that gives me such a level of mental arousal and happiness. I heard another longtime D/s practitioner talk about the "mental cock" or "mental vagina", how you get aroused mentally without being aroused physically, and that very much describes the feeling I get when I receive service from a partner that I'm in a D/s relationship with.

A few weeks ago, Henry moved to my city. We were both struggling with the long distance and wanting to see each other more, and since he had fewer ties to his area, he decided to make the move. It's been so good to have him around more often. I love seeing him multiple times per week and having our relationship feel more substantial and less of a weekend thing. It's definitely been positive for both of us.

Last time he was over, I had a headache and wasn't feeling that well. I had planned to cook dinner but I told him that I wasn't feeling up to it and that I was going to have a shower. I told him to choose one of the frozen pizzas and make that for dinner instead. When I came back downstairs in my bathrobe to relax on the couch, I found that he had customized the pizza with my favourite vegetables and extra cheese. When it was ready, he brought it out and served it to me. He asked me what I wanted to drink and made sure to keep my glass full. He surprised me with a dessert he'd made, and then cleared all the dishes and washed them naked, which is a fetish of mine. Nothing is sexier than a naked man doing chores :) Afterwards, I lay on the couch and he rubbed my feet with massage oil while we watched a movie. It was an absolutely perfect evening.

Perhaps you can't pinpoint any specific action in there that shows he's my submissive. After all, any of us could do that for a friend or partner. But it was the mindfulness and connection between us that really turned me on. He followed the protocol I like when being served, and made sure to make eye contact with me while I accepted what he was offering. It wasn't like the stereotypical "get me a beer" kind of thing where I wasn't looking and just grabbing the item; we had a moment every time he offered me something. And it was so, so good.

I was feeling a little better afterwards so we went upstairs, and I wanted him to feel as happy as I was. We kissed passionately, and it wasn't long before his cock was in my pussy. I mostly wanted to feel that intense connection with him more than I wanted erotic satisfaction, and I got it. I purred in his ear for him to tell me what he wanted tonight, and that he'd get it. I don't always handle things like that but I felt so good and wanted to make sure he had the same. We have a rule that when I specifically ask for a reply, he can't cop out by saying whatever I want; he does have to tell me. He said he'd like to use the sounds and have me play with his ass. Oh, that I could do! It's always so sexy to slide those long steel rods into his cock, and to watch his eyes roll back in his head. I love the way it feels to have his ass tight around my fingers. It wasn't long before he was having an intense orgasm and then we lay back and cuddled until we fell asleep.

It was a perfect day.

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